Anyone who watched the celebrity version of the BBC’s Race Across The World last autumn would have been left in no doubt about what a fantastic, hands-on dad TV presenter Jeff Brazier is.
Competing with his younger son Freddy, 20, it was clear they had a close and loving bond.
Life hasn’t been easy for Jeff. He became a young dad aged 24 when his partner, Jade Goody, had the first of their two children.
The relationship didn’t last and Jade died of cervical cancer when eldest son Bobby was five and Freddy just four, leaving him to raise them alone.
All credit to Jeff for stepping up. His boys come across as lovely, kind and polite young men, and he should be proud.
Yet, despite all this, I was very sad to hear about the rift that has developed between him and Freddy over his son’s relationship with his grandmother – Jade’s mum Jackiey Budden.
Jeff is said to have consulted lawyers in the hope of preventing ongoing contact with her.
We don’t know the reasons why, other than family friends revealing that Jeff believes Jackiey is detrimental to Freddy’s wellbeing.
TV presenter Jeff Brazier competing with his young son Freddy, 20, on the celebrity version of the BBC’s Race Across The World. It was clear to see that they have a close and loving bond
Jeff with his ex, Jade Goody, who died of cervical cancer when eldest son Bobby was five and Freddy just four, leaving the TV presenter to raise them alone
The rift seems to be long-standing. When actor and model Bobby, 21, competed on Strictly two years ago, Jeff wouldn’t allow Jackiey to be in the audience. Jeff must believe he has a very good reason to keep her out of the boys’ lives.
However, Freddy is now an adult old enough to make his own decisions – and mistakes.
I worry that in trying to block him from seeing his grandmother, Jeff may end up damaging his own relationship with his son.
There is a wider issue here about the importance of a grandparent in a child’s life.
Jade’s mother and Freddy’s grandmother Jackiey Budden
Due to reasons including divorce, bereavement and family feuds, there are now countless grannies and grandpas up and down the country who are being prevented from seeing their grandchildren.
Sadly, there is nothing they can do about it – under English and Welsh law, a grandparent has no automatic right of access. If an informal arrangement fails then mediation and a court order may be needed.
Yet so many of us have treasured memories of our times with grand-
parents and remember how happy, safe and loved we felt on a visit to granny’s house. Our grandparents help us to learn and understand ourselves. They are a rich source of stories, not just about our families, but also about what happened in the past.
Very often grandparents are a child’s number one champion, providing a wise, loving and guiding hand in a way that a parent can’t.
In some cases, youngsters prefer to consult grandparents with their problems, should they feel mum or dad will be too busy, strict or unsympathetic.
Yes, kids needs their parents. But sometimes only granny or grandpa will do.
Camilla’s rules for marriage
The King and Queen celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary last week. Camilla says friendship, laughing at the same things and getting on with life are essential to a happy marriage
What’s the secret to a long and happy marriage? The Queen, who celebrated her 20th wedding anniversary to the King last week, was asked this on a trip to Florence and came up with a good answer: ‘I suppose it’s just sort of friendship, really. Laughing at the same things, getting on with life. I suppose doing this [their royal work] takes up most of the time.’
Camilla added that she and Charles ‘are always going in different directions, like ships that pass in the night, really. We whizz past each other. In fact, we have got a bit of a catch up this afternoon!’
It can’t always be easy being in the public eye constantly, especially at an age when most people are winding down. But that is the key.
Friendship – and staying occupied – is essential. You’re spending your life with someone, so you should actually like them. I’ve also seen so many couples who seem to have a perfect relationship when they are busily engaged in life, but come retirement, their world shrinks and they are forced to spend more time together, causing cracks to appear.
No matter how compatible you are, being with someone 24/7 is bound to cause tension.
A saliva test for prostate cancer, which can be done at home, has brought national screening one step closer.
The test has been shown in studies to be more accurate than the NHS PSA blood test. I hope it’s rolled out very soon.
Older people are less likely to be given antibiotics for common infections by their GP compared with younger adults – despite being at higher risk, a study suggests.
It’s true we need to address over-prescribing of antibiotics, which is vital if we are to tackle antibiotic resistance.
But this study would suggest doctors are withholding antibiotics from older people unfairly. I suspect this is because they are seen as an easy target.
They are less likely to complain and more likely to accept what a doctor says compared with younger people.
Imagine if in the study we substituted the word ‘older’ for ‘gay’ or ‘ethnic minority’. There would be an outcry because it would suggest discrimination and doctors making decisions based on a personal characteristic of the patient.
Yet ageism remains the acceptable face of intolerance – so much so that few people even bat an eyelid, let alone protest.
Dr Max prescribes… gardening
Spring is here and there’s never a better time to get to work in the garden.
It’s not just about mowing the lawn and planting tubs, evidence shows that gardening has tremendous benefits for both your physical and mental health.
So if you’re lucky enough to have outdoor space, get digging and reap the rewards!