Before the release of his film Dev D in 2009, actor Abhay Deol moved to New York. He took a break from Bollywood at the peak of his career. However, the actor returned to India shortly after the release of Dev D. In a recent interview, Abhay opened up about his hiatus from acting, citing that he didn’t want the fame and attention that came with being a public figure.
In an interview with Humans Of Bombay, Abhay shared that he moved to New York just before the release of Dev D. He said, “I was finding it hard to deal with the attention and fame because I started getting flashbacks of when I was a kid. I was a sensitive child and I didn’t like the attention. I liked the art, creativity and medium. I knew that Dev D was going to be big, but I didn’t want to be famous. But at the same time, I wanted to act.”
The actor continued, “There was a conflict within me. I focused a lot on the negatives. I hadn’t resolved many issues, so I just ran away because I was afraid of being famous and everything that came with it.”
Abhay Deol is the son of actor-director Ajit Deol and Usha Deol. He is also the nephew of veteran actor Dharmendra, and the cousin of actors Sunny Deol, Bobby Deol, and Esha Deol. Talking about growing up in a film environment, he said, “The privilege I see for myself growing up in a film environment is that I saw fame upfront as a kid and I was never enamoured by it. A lot of people will first chase that and they usually get bitten once they hit a peak. I was already bitten. I knew it would bring me down. How do I navigate this space? And, I didn’t know how to.”
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Abhay added, “There was no right or wrong, it was definitely a trauma response. But, it has to happen. I don’t regret it. I didn’t care about the stardom; I cared about the acting.”
His relocation to New York wasn’t a piece of case either as the actor entered into a ‘self-destructive’ phase. Describing what that year was like, he revealed, “When I went there, I knew it wasn’t going to be forever because I was just indulging. I was very destructive. Some actors take their work home. It’s a process to learn how not to be affected. I am not now. I don’t take my work home. You should just embrace the privilege of being an actor and stop taking yourself so seriously. But, that didn’t happen at the end of that year. If anything, I got more and more destructive as the year progressed.”
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“When I looked at the industry, I just saw the trauma as a kid and remembered the experiences that my Tayaji and my brothers had gone through. The things they said, the stories they had and the system that was in place. It’s called the glamorous industry, but there’s nothing glamorous in it. All my fears were there. I just felt like walking away,” he shared.
Talking about his decision to come back from New York, Abhay Deol said, “I knew I wasn’t going to stay there. I was just in New York playing the part I played in Dev D, getting drunk, not working and being terrible with my money. It was a waste in that sense. I won’t call it a waste now because I learnt something, but it was destructive. I wanted to come back home and continue to earn and support myself and my family. There are responsibilities, you have to come back. This is a make believe world. I knew it wasn’t going to be permanent, it was a temporary escape.”